When it don’t come easy

Well, here we are 7dpiui.  This has been definitely a different experience than the first one.  See, I am looking ahead at 2 of the biggest life changes one can have.  I am privy to information that I shouldn’t be.  It is a good thing, but at the sames time, a bit of a stressor.  I am set to find out that we are either pregnant or not, and I am getting laid off, both on the same day.  So, it puts a new twist on the “TWW”.  On one hand, I want the time to fly, so we can know if we are pregnant…and on the other hand I want it to take it’s sweet time. Each day passed is one day closer to me not having a job for the first time in 6 years.  That’s not entirely true, I do bar tend one night a week at the local queer bar, but I am talking about my career.  I have been in this position for 4.5 years, and have grown very comfortable.  Unfortunately, the company cannot afford me anymore, and we are parting ways.  I was lucky enough to find out with some notice, no thanks to said company.  So I have been semi-actively trying to find something else.  We thought long and hard about trying for IUI #2, as it was scheduled for a week after I found out the fate of my job.  We decided to move forward with the IUI, and not worry about it.  I am a firm believer in “everything happens for a reason”, and “it will work itself out”…because it always does.  So, throwing caution to the wind, we did it!  I am not getting any younger, and neither are these eggs of mine!  

So, let’s look ahead to July 8th with an open mind, and an open heart.  Change is one of the things I fear most in life, and always have.  I know deep down, it is normally for the best.  However, I am stubborn, none the less.  One thing is for sure, change is coming…

“I don’t know nothing except change will come, year after year what we do is undone.  Time keeps moving from a crawl to a run, I wonder if we’re ever gonna get home.” ~PG

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One Response to When it don’t come easy

  1. TheKeele's says:

    Best of luck to you! Everything DOES happen for a reason. Sending my good juju your way.
    ~s.

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